“Life was simpler when cats had eyebrows”

This grim kitty single-handedly dismantled the patriarchy.

via 23 Ugly Medieval Cat Paintings That Will Speak To Your Soul

If you ever need to retrieve your severed penis from a cat (or, I guess, any severed penis), apparently fish will do the trick.


just bearly hanging in there

After knocking over people’s bins in the search for food in the area of Daytona Beach, Florida, a black bear walked into one of the resident’s gardens and sat comfortably in their hammock.

“He got in the hammock like he was a tourist or something, then something spooked him and he ran right back there,” said Vincent James, the owner of the hammock, to news station Wesh Orlando.

“Then half an hour later I come back and I saw there he is in the hammock again.”

 

Bear hangs out on a hammock, runs off, comes back to hang out in the hammock again – Americas – World – The Independent.

 

BTW, amazing title guys


hamster pizza party

 

Hamster Eats Tiny Pizza, Kevin Durant’s MVP Speech, and More Viral Videos – The Daily Beast.


List of animals with fraudulent diplomas

Colby Nolan

Colby Nolan is a housecat who was awarded an MBA in 2004 by Trinity Southern University, a Dallas-based diploma mill, sparking a fraud lawsuit by the Pennsylvania attorney general’s office.

Colby Nolan belongs to a deputy attorney general. In looking to expose Trinity Southern University for fraud, some undercover agents had the then six-year-old Colby Nolan obtain a bachelor’s degree in business administration for $299. On the cat’s application, the agents claimed that the cat had previously taken courses at a community college, worked at a fast-food restaurant, babysat, and maintained a newspaper route. Then the school informed Colby that, due to the job experience listed on his application, he was eligible for an executive MBA for $100 more. The agents then sent for Colby’s transcript, which claimed that he had a GPA of 3.5.

Jerry Pappert, Pennsylvania’s attorney general, filed a lawsuit against Trinity Southern University upon learning that the cat had received the degree. In the lawsuit, Pappert also told the diploma mill, which had used e-mail spam to sell degrees, to provide restitution to anyone who had ordered a degree from them.

In December 2004, the Texas attorney general obtained a temporary restraining order under the Texas Deceptive Trade Practices Act against Trinity Southern and its owners, Craig B. and Alton S. Poe. The court also ordered the school’s assets frozen. In March 2005, the Poes were assessed penalties of over $100,000 by the court and were ordered not to market or promote fraudulent, substandard degree programs or to represent their university as being accredited or affiliated with legitimate universities. It was reported that the Poes also were associated with Wesleyan International University and Prixo Southern University. Trinity Southern University’s website has been offline since 2005.

via List of animals with fraudulent diplomas – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.


Hello Kitty’s newest friend is a sad egg

egg1

 

The latest character to join the Sanrio family, the Japanese lifestyle brand behind Hello Kitty, isn’t a cuddly animal, or even a living creature. It’s an egg named Gudetama.

The company just released a short film (which can be seen below) featuring the little egg. In it, an egg shell is cracked open and out pops Gudetama, a glob-like creature with arms and legs.

Gudetama is pictured fried on rice, as tomago sushi and dripping from a cracked egg. He’s whiny, always has a face of despair, and according to the Sanrio release on the little guy, is “unmotivated.” His attitude is related to the fact that he only exists to be eaten.

egg2

 

And Gudetama is already on Twitter, with pictures of him on a plate of rice with the caption “impossible, oh.”

The character was part of Sanrio’s contest last year to find new characters based on popular Japanese food. Some of the other characters included a tofu geisha and a bread-shaped panda bear.

After a public vote, Gudetama was the runner-up, while Kirimi-chan, a salmon head, won first place and was developed into a line of products.

Slimy salmon and now slimy raw egg? Maybe there’s something to be said for drawing arms and legs on slimy foods we can’t get enough of.

via Hello Kitty’s newest friend is an egg named Gudetama – latimes.com.

 

EGGSCELLENT (yup, I’m trying super hard right now, sorry)


Cat Heaven Island

A Japanese photographer named Fubirai spent 5 years photographing and documenting the lives of semi-feral cats who live off the coast of Fukuoka, Japan. This island has been called Cat Heaven Island by many. One look at the photographs and life there, and you’ll see exactly why.

Behold. A cat lover’s paradise.

via Cat Heaven Island Photos Where Cats Run Freely And Wildly.

 

So many meowr adorable kitties at the link! Seriously, best place ever.


Just Don’t Die Pennant – Stay Home Club

you can do it!

 

via Just Don’t Die Pennant – Stay Home Club.

Best advice all day.


the internet will steal your raccoon if you aren’t careful

In the days before online video, a long-bearded man dancing with his pet raccoon to Aretha Franklin on his porch in rural Tennessee would have gone unnoticed, just one weird blissful moment in a world full of them. But Mark “Coonrippy” Brown’s clip (above) of him dancing with his four-legged companion Gunshow has gone viral viral since he posted it in July 2012, racking up more than 1 million views on YouTube and attracting so much attention it was featured on The Tonight Show and Good Morning America, which are like YouTube for old people.

via The Government Took This Man’s Raccoon Away Because of a Viral Video | VICE United States.

..it was featured on The Tonight Show and Good Morning America, which are like YouTube for old people” = one of the best things I’ve read in awhile


Kitten Thinks Of Nothing But Murder All Day

 

via Kitten Thinks Of Nothing But Murder All Day.


life tip: do not ever ever ever ever act like this ever

I wanted to write a corny title like “she really puts the NUTS in DONUTS” but really I cannot stop thinking about how much it would suck to have been one of the employees 😦

via Lady at Dunkin Donuts Goes Crazy Over Receipt – YouTube.

This is pretty much the most insane overreaction to anything I’ve seen. I cannot believe this happened because THEY DID NOT GIVE HER A RECEIPT THE NIGHT BEFORE. Seriously. That was what caused this.

Favorite quote: “I’m about to nuke your whole fucking planet from Mars.” <<  WHAT?

Okay, I need to look at some kitten pictures… hold on..

k1

Okay… that definitely helps a bit.

k2

Ah! Finally breathing more steadily. Thanks, snuggle kitten.

k3

ACK NO!!! TOO SOON!!!!

k5

It’s okay kitten. It is not your fault.

k6

I’m glad we made up.

godly-kitten1

KITTENS MAKE EVERYTHING BETTER.