“Life was simpler when cats had eyebrows”

This grim kitty single-handedly dismantled the patriarchy.

via 23 Ugly Medieval Cat Paintings That Will Speak To Your Soul

If you ever need to retrieve your severed penis from a cat (or, I guess, any severed penis), apparently fish will do the trick.


is it a f-ing baby wheeel?

NSFW as it contains 5 billion curses. God bless this guy. I keep playing this in the background and can’t stop giggling.

“That’s a tuner bro! Jay, that’s a tuner or something. Jay, look at it. Come on. Oh man, Jay, let’s pull it in dude. LOOK AT THAT FUCKING THING. OH MY GOD. HO-LY SHIT. OH MY GOD, man. We are seeing some shit we ain’t never seen before…”

Source: Michael Bergin


Pictures of People Scanning QR-codes tumblr

Pictures of People Scanning QR-codes.


GLUTEN FREE MUSEUM

gluten free museum

via GLUTEN FREE MUSEUM.


Broad City

broad-city-1-08-wedding

And what about offscreen—has success changed the two?

Jacobson: “Ilana has become pretty much a diva. She has a lot of assistants, but she doesn’t know their names. . . . She never takes the subway anymore. She won’t take the stairs. Not even an escalator…. And when someone doesn’t recognize Ilana? She lets them have it.”

Glazer: “Abbi has changed. She has those sneakers with the wheels on the heels and now she only slides places. . . . And she also wears wigs. She shaved her head and she doesn’t want to give that to America.”

via Broad City’s Abbi Jacobson and Ilana Glazer | Vanity Fair.

I’m obsessed with this show and these magnificent ladies right now.


to B or not to BnB

What’s Yours Was Mine: An Airbnb Review: By

[…]Which brings me to your day planner, in the poorly locked top drawer of the desk. Who is “Q”? You and s/he sure seem to have had a lot of dinners last month, plus that long weekend in the Pfalz. And “N”? To be honest, Elfriede, you seem kind of overcommitted. There are all sorts of people out there, not all of whom will understand you. Take, for instance, the dark-chocolate-orange Häagen-Dazs in your freezer. It’s my favorite flavor. And my choice refreshment is the Lagavulin that I see you’ve stored behind the stylish garments in your closet. Coincidence?

Sad_Ice_Cream_by_AdventDeo

via What’s Yours Was Mine: An Airbnb Review – The New Yorker.

Smart little ditty that encapsulates why Airbnb gives me the heebie-jeebies.

I finally used AirBnB as a guest for the first time a little bit ago. The hardest thing for me was not trying on the person’s shoes. I understand that sounds gross & weird, because it completely is. She just had a lovely collection that kept staring at me from the hallway. I pointedly ignored the faint, raspy whispers.. “Liiiiiisa. We’re just your size. I bet we’d be cuuuute on yooou. We just missssss feeeeeet.”

Asshole manipulative adorable shoes. I didn’t touch them, thank god, because I don’t need to be that person. We actually had quite a perfect Airbnb experience, so I highly recommend it (and by it, I really only mean one person’s apartment in Brooklyn, because that’s all I know).


Sedaris: Long Way Home

Hugh and I spent weeks in the summer of 2007 studying. During that time, I learned the difference between the House of Lords and the House of Commons. I learned that in 1857 women in the U.K. won the right to divorce their husbands. I learned that people below the age of sixteen cannot deliver milk in the U.K., but I don’t think I learned why. It was just one of those weird English injustices, like summer.

Before taking the real test, I took the fake ones provided at the back of the study manual. “What is the traditional meat served for Christmas dinner?” was one of the questions. Another was “How might you stop young people playing tricks on you at Halloween?” It was multiple-choice, and possible answers included “call the police” and “hide from them.”

via Long Way Home – The New Yorker.

a little Sedaris for all

oh & click on this picture to lead you a little bit more of David. It's one of those days.

oh & click on this picture to lead you a little bit more of David. It’s one of those days.


just bearly hanging in there

After knocking over people’s bins in the search for food in the area of Daytona Beach, Florida, a black bear walked into one of the resident’s gardens and sat comfortably in their hammock.

“He got in the hammock like he was a tourist or something, then something spooked him and he ran right back there,” said Vincent James, the owner of the hammock, to news station Wesh Orlando.

“Then half an hour later I come back and I saw there he is in the hammock again.”

 

Bear hangs out on a hammock, runs off, comes back to hang out in the hammock again – Americas – World – The Independent.

 

BTW, amazing title guys


hamster pizza party

 

Hamster Eats Tiny Pizza, Kevin Durant’s MVP Speech, and More Viral Videos – The Daily Beast.